Martini Madness

We went to an event that had the words "martini" and "madness" in its description/title. It was a fundraiser for the Cedar Rapids Museum of Art. It was a given that the mystery lady and I would go given our passion for proper martinis. We usually don't stray from our Beefeater Gin Martinis.The foo foo or designer concoctions are just too campy.

I stuck to my guns save for the fact that you could not find a bottle of Beefeaters in the house. The locally made Gin from the nice folks at Clearheart Distillery was the heartof many of the potions. My formula was the same at each tasting station.....Gin with a lemon twist. Actually one of the martinis featured was titled "Straight from the (Clear) Heart-tini"

The mystery lady was more outgoing and tried some of the others. At one time I caught her with one in each hand. Of course I would expect no less from her. Some of the names of these were....Green Benzini, Tek-tini, Citrus Smile (From Gehring Orthodontics) [note one of the pics with me and Mrs. Gehring....looks like I had reached my limit], Scottaroo-tini, Blue Screen of Death...and the list goes on....for a total of 19 different recipes.

There was some fancy finger food and there was an offering of Beer and Wine which did not get as much play as the martinis and there was even bottled water.....I think WC Fields just made another revolution in his grave.

We were treated to some great tunes and a live and silent auction. There was a bona fide princess amongst us......but thats the subject of another blog.

At the end of the evening two of the blokes present tried out the express elevator to the ground floor. I think this is just before it broke.

A good time way had by all....Thank God for martinis.

LeRoy

When I first started out in the business, one of my first contacts was LeRoy. LeRoy was a sales rep for the Old Northwest Company....but we are not going there. LeRoy taught me my work ethic. We worked our butts off making calls. We would take an occasional "coffee break" and when we stopped at the Colony Inn for one of those breaks, I ordered a Pepsi. He was aghast that I did not drink coffee. I was 18 years old at the time and had not yet acquired the taste for coffee. He proceeds to tell me that if I am going to be successful in business I need to drink coffee....and don't be a sissy and doctor it up with cream and sugar! Well due to his prompting...I now have a coffee habit.

He taught me how to write upside down so when sitting across from a prospect it would be readable for them. We called on business after business telling our story. Long after I wanted to call it a day, it was LeRoy who wanted to continue the calls. God Bless.

LeRoy was driving a huge Oldsmobile 98 ( they don't make them anymore) with more whistles and bells than I had ever had on anything I owned. He is responsible for me wanting a similar machine. Soon I went out and bought a butter yellow Plymouth Fury III loaded with every option there was to have.

Sometimes after a hard day working it was prudent to have an adult beverage after work. We were in my basement and I removed my clip on tie. Once again he was taken aback and told me I had to learn how to tie a tie and not wear the clipons. He had me go upstairs to get a real tie so he could show me how to do the knot. It didn't take me long to catch on and I was properly outfitted the next time we went out on calls.


At the time my poison was probably whiskey and seven or scotch and soda and Lee suggested that I ought to try martinis....no kid stuff Vodka Martinis...but the proper Gin Martinis...... I still remember the evening at his house when he explained that one would not be enough and three would be too many...sort of like women's breasts. The first one was gawd awful and the second was slightly better, but by the time for the third they were quite tasty. I never made it home that night upon the insistence of his wife who very diplomatically called my wife to explain my plight.

When my first Mini Cooper needed painting it was LeRoy who came to the rescue with his spray gun. He bought the first 240Z in the area and after he had a little fun with it "let" me buy it from him. At that time they were still called Datsun's! It was a 1970 model.

There are way more instances where took me under his arm and showed me the ropes and thats a good thing. Somethings you just can't blog about.

Today is his birthday. Happy Birthday, Lee! Don't drink your bath water.

Carl, Esq.

Carl is an interesting gentleman. He could easily have the word "esquire" behind his name. Carl is a barrister with an uncanny ability to give everyone, he so warrants as worthy, a nickname. If you don't have a nickname you are not a part of his world. He also names his cars and his house and probably his stock certificates.

Carl follows his self-imposed regimen and there is little chance for deviation of that regimen.

Until recently, he would come to the Ox Yoke Inn every Sunday at precisely 1:00pm. He would bring his gal Sal and go to his assigned table in the Rattskeller and order his first martini. It would be straight up and have an olive...people who know me well, know my martinis are also straight up...but no olive...because I don't eat anything green. Sally would have the same and Carl would light up his pipe and savor the martini.

If I didn't have anything important to do at 1:00 pm on a Sunday, I would join them. I would be subjected to some very old jokes, but I laughed on cue as if I had never heard them. Occasionally, I'd be able to tell them one that they had not heard and that gave me great pleasure.

After the first tini was consumed, he would summon the barkeep, who also was given a special nickname and ask if "she still remembered the formula" for the second martini. The second martini was consumed with the same gusto as the first and then the barkeep was summoned for a "sharsie" . The sharsie was another martini that Carl & Sally would share.

Shortly after the "sharsie" was consumed, you'd hear their table reservation announced over the intercom and they would work their way upstairs for the same meal they have every every Sunday.

Carl always tipped the bartender with Susan B. Anthony dollars...I believe he is the only person in the United States that uses the coin.

They don't come to the Ox Yoke any more...no one knows why....damn I miss those old jokes.

Carl is old and doesn't have a computer or a cell phone. His cane is his palm pilot, Sally is his co-pilot.... he gets along just fine,

Oh,....my name is Harnishfeger
Audrey is Bathsheba
.............There are others.....I took the time to record them....amongst Billy's friends you will find:
Naked Gun, Marcel Marceau, Tulip, Sumo, Sloe Eyed Temptress, Kennibunkport, Macganahan, Ziggy Speilhagen, Sir Ronnie, Zoom, Svelte, Sloopy, Oshkosh, and the list goes on.

Maybe a 'bloggie' will see his or her name in the list.....let me know who I forgot.