Billy goes to the China beach

There is nothing the Puzzler likes better than a good day on the beach. So........the Puzzler, the school marm and Billy search for a secluded China Beach. This is not an easy undertaking, as they first need to find a cab driver with an extended van so the lung can be transported as well. There is a present ban on bald cab drivers which has limited the number of cabs available. ( More on this later) Evidently they got the job done. Due to the recent rains the beaches have been sparsly populated...but they went anyway.

Billy likes the beach too. I'm really not sure why. Being confined to an iron lung and all. He can't enjoy the water and he requires a shady spot. Being out in the direct sun broils him...forget about the sunscreen....pass the asbestos instead.

If you ask me, I think he likes to eye the Chinese girls...at least I hope its the girls. The Puzzler says he enjoyed the girls gymnastics while at the Olympics so far.

I gave Billy my hand me down Kodak 5 Mega pixel digital camera and Carol has agreed to help with the downloads and this is what I got in my mailbox today.

On a slow boat to China

You would
think that the people who were entrusted to care for Billy would contact us and let us know how he is doing. Its seems like anyone who has enough time to send out daily postcards or do entries in their blog could send us a quick email. Its puzzling.

Having not heard from Billy or his guardians, we took it upon ourselves to head to China to find him. It could be the proverbial lung in a haystack...but Billy sticks out and we knew the general area to look for him.....the Olympics.

Our friends Bill and Carolyn have a power boat and plenty of spare time on their hands and they are always up for an adventure. They have known Billy for a few years and it was a "natural" to ask them to take us over there.

We motored to Milwaukee, where they moor their 1976 Hatteras Trawler. This boat is immaculate from bow to stern and looks like the day it left the manufacturer. The four of us along with their dog, Outback, headed up Lake Michigan to find the Saint Lawrence Seaway to begin our journey to China.



The fridge and freezer were stocked to the gills and the bar was well appointed. Eighteen hundred gallons of diesel fuel was ready to be burned.

We arrived on Thursday evening with intentions of leaving at first light. However, the Grey Goose...must of goosed me big time because day one's departure was delayed slightly whilst I recovered enough to co-pilot the vessel. Once I was upright in the left seat we were headed for Port Washington and points beyond.

At Port Washington we were weary from the day of travel because of the 4 - 6 foot swells we encountered. The OUTBACK usually runs full out at 9 mph, but the swells and the headwind lowered our max speed to 8.4mph.

We did some quick calculation on the miles remaining and our travel speed and soon discovered that we would probably not make it in time before the Olympics would have their final closing ceremony.

Just about that time my cell phone announced that Billy was calling. ( I have a dedicated ring for Billy) Mystery solved...he had "hitched" a ride with the President and first lady in Airforce one. Secret Service required that he not reveal his location until he was officially separated from them.

the fact that Billy was all right provided a good reason to celebrate, so we ventured on land and found a quaint bar made out of a Laker Boat. Ryan the bartender kept us occupied with information on his studies at University of Wisconsin in Madtown. He is a linebacker and is looking forward to being able to play against Iowa again if the schedule matches.

After a sufficient cocktail hour it was fitting that we head back to the boat for some nourishment and a good nights sleep as the Billy mystery being solved was like a huge weight being lifted from my shoulders. Priscilla and Otto would have never let me hear the end of it had something happened to Billy. And, besides that, we were relieved that we were dismissed from our 6360 mile boat trip.

We went back to Milwaukee and did some undercover work at the International Trading Company. I'd love to be able to tell you what went on there but regulations
forbid me disclosing any of the details.

Billy in limbo

We're really not panicking yet because we feel Billy is probably jet lagged and that is why we have not heard a word.

We did receive a postcard this morning from the Puzzler. However the postcard made mention of a typhoon which made us a bit uneasy. Billy does not do well if there are high winds around him.

I sent an email to him with some material for his next book and asked him to update me on how Billy survived the trip.

The question remains....is he jet-lagged or is he blown away? Stop back here for updates.

Where is Billy?

I HAVE NOT HEARD A WORD FROM BILLY! I AM WORRIED.

Its official - Billy Crippe World Travelor

We had the family meeting yesterday and there was a lot of discussion....you know like will the Puzzler be able to continue to keep his auxiliary power supply charged? ....Will the smog bother him? Will there be problems going thru airport security? Where will he be on the airplane? What about all those steps at the Olympic venues?

We had lots of questions and very few answers.....but this would be a once in a lifetime experience for Billy Crippe.

At 7:30 we delivered Billy and his meager luggage to the Puzzlers residence. Shortly thereafter scrapper Bob came by with his Dodge Caravan and loaded everyone up to go to the airport. I don't think Bob got the word that Billy was going along as we had to leave Bob's RAGBRAI weary bicycle in the Puzzlers garage so that there would be room for Billy and Carol's seven bags. (No big shake....because Bob will probably not ride his bike until its time for next year's RAGBRAI)

We went along to the Eastern Iowa Airport (CID)to say so long to Billy for awhile....next stop would be O'Hare and then 16 hours in air to Beijing.

To say Billy was sweating it would be an understatement...but then the temp was 82F and the Humidity was 70%.

Check back...this could get interesting.